New Year, New Blog!

Hey Everyone!
I have a new blog...I decided to switch things up a bit...so here's the new addy.

www.ramblingsofamother.wordpress.com

Goodbye 2007! Welcome 2008!

2007 was another year of great change for our family: some expected, some not. First our awesome vacation (that feels more like it was 4 years ago) and the taxi ride from NYC to Buffalo!! Then just a week later, Milo finally arriving. It's been such an adventure with him. At the close of 2007 I believe we're in a better place with him, he knows us better and we know him better. In May, the whirlwind of taking in Emma. Never in a million years would I have believed (even on May 14th) that on May 15th we'd add another child to the fold. I will admit in the final hours of 2007, I leaned over to Steve and whispered in his ear... "No more additions next year!" We beat our record and have been in this house longer than anywhere else in our entire marriage! It was a year of tremendous blessing and provision.

As I look to 2008 I feel excitement to see where God will take us this year. There is so much new in our lives, and as I watch all the kids grow and develop I marvel at the complexity of their creation. It's humbling to know that we have 4 kids, and yet here were are, learning to parent again. Our experience with Logan and Abby was so different, not better or worse, just different: to parent Justus and Emma will be a whole new ride. They have totally different modes of learning. It's helping in how we communicate and interact with Logan and Abby. It's made us better people.

It is hard to believe that Steve and I will be married 8 years. It's even harder to believe that Steve is going to be 40 this year!! (bring on the midlife crisis). I'm anticipating great things of what God will do for Steve and I. I feel like we're going into a new chapter of our lives, I'm not sure how to articulate it, but I really believe we're going deeper, into uncharted territory. It's exciting. I love Steve so much, and I think it's neat that after 12 years we're still learning things about each other.

I also believe that for myself, I'm going somewhere better. I feel a certain peace about things, peace with who I am, the woman I am becoming. Maybe I'm finally growing up. I never realized how much a person can evolve over such a short period of time. I hope to find more of me this year, to know more of what God has gifted me with. I want to be a better woman, a better wife, a better mother this year.

So I welcome 2008 with open arms.

The Evil Eye

Merry Christmas!

Well, there has been a lull in the blogging for a reason. Christmas has come and gone: we enjoyed a wonderful visit with Steve's mom and my family, ate some great turkey, opened many gifts...oh and wait one more thing....we got the flu :( The whole family, all 6 of us!!!! It started Christmas Eve, and continued on and is still going on today. This was the first time that Steve and I have been sick at the same time, and I hope and pray that never happens again. I'm really ready for this bug to leave the house, and I hope we don't ring in the New Year with it. It has been a very long exhausting week! I hope to enjoy the second half of the kids break from school significantly more than this week.
I hope that your Christmas was filled with lots of great memories! All the best for 2008!!! God bless!

Bible History told by Children!!

In case you're a little foggy on your biblical history, let our junior
church students help you with this complete overview of the Bible, compiled
from their essays:

In the beginning, which occurred near the start, there was nothing but God,
darkness, and some gas. The Bible says, 'The Lord thy God is one,' but I
think He must be a lot older than that. Anyway, God said, 'Give me a light!'
and someone did. Then God made the world.

He split the Adam and made Eve. Adam and Eve were naked, but they weren't
embarrassed because mirrors hadn't been invented yet.

Adam and Eve disobeyed God by eating one bad apple, so they were driven
from the Garden of Eden. Not sure what they were driven in though, because
they didn't have cars.

Adam and Eve had a son, Cain, who hated his brother as long as he was Abel.

Pretty soon all of the early people died off, except for Methuselah, who
lived to be like a million or something.

One of the next important people was Noah, who was a good guy, but one of
his kids was kind of a ham. Noah built a large boat and put his family and
some animals on it. He asked some other people to join him, but they said
they would have to take a rain check.

After Noah came Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. Jacob was more famous than his
brother, Esau, because Esau sold Jacob his birthmark in exchange for some
pot roast. Jacob had a son named Joseph who wore a really loud sports coat.

Another important Bible guy is Moses, whose real name was Charlton Heston.

Moses led the Israel Lights out of Egypt and away from the evil Pharaoh
after God sent ten plagues on Pharaoh's people. These plagues included
frogs, mice, lice, bowels, and no cable. God fed the Israel Lights every day
with manicotti. Then He gave them His top ten Commandments. These include
don't lie, cheat, smoke, dance, or covet your neighbor's bottom (the Bible
uses a bad word for bottom that I'm not supposed to say. But my Dad uses it
sometimes when he talks about the President). Oh, yeah, I just thought of
one more: Humor they father and they mother. One of Moses' best helpers was
Joshua who was the first Bible guy to use spies. Joshua fought the battle
of Geritol and the fence fell over on the town.

After Joshua came David. He got to be king by killing a giant with a
slingshot. He had a son named Solomon who had about 300 wives and 500
porcupines. My teacher says he was wise, but that doesn't sound very wise
to me.

After Solomon there were a bunch of major league prophets. One of these was
Jonah, who was swallowed by a big whale and then barfed up on the shore.
There were also some minor league prophets, but I guess we don't have to
worry about them

After the Old Testament came the New Testament. Jesus is the star of the New
Testament. He was born in Bethlehem in a barn. (I wish I had been born in a
barn, too, because my mom is always saying to me, 'Close the door! Were you
born in a barn' It would be nice to say, 'As a matter of fact, I was.').

During His life, Jesus had many arguments with sinners like the Pharisees
and the Republicans. Jesus also had twelve opossums.The worst one was Judas
Asparagus. Judas was so evil that they named a terrible vegetable after him.

Jesus was a great man. He healed many leopards and even preached to some
Germans on the Mount. But the Republicans and all those guys put Jesus on
trial before Pontius the Pilot. Pilot didn't stick up for Jesus. He just
washed his hands instead.

Anyways, Jesus died for our sins, then came back to life again. He went up
to Heaven but will be back at the end of the Aluminum. His return is
foretold in the book of Revolution.

The 12 Days of Christmas!!

What a Week!

This week has been incredibly difficult for me as a mother. Logan was having some trouble on the bus, and this week it has exploded into a huge mess! I won't go into a lot of details, but let's just say I'm pretty disappointed with the bus company and in particular the bus driver. There have been some unacceptable things happening on the bus, and judgement calls made by the driver that have made that momma bear instinct come right to the playing field. Thankfully the school is 100% behind us and are working towards a solution to the problem. Hopefully by the end of this, we'll have some order back to our lives, and Logan can once again be happy on the bus.


It is so difficult to know how to react and advocate for Logan when he is non-verbal. He can't say all that's happened, but his behaviour is speaking volumes, and that is what is stressing me out. For those of you who know Logan well, you'll know that when he cries or is upset, the whole world will cry with him. He's just such a happy guy, so when something hurts him, it hurts everyone. This week has been very difficult not only for me, but for him too, and that is what concerns me the most.


I will admit that I don't handle stress well. I can step up to the plate and do what needs to be done, but it manifests itself in other ways. This week it has shown itself as insomnia which in turn has given me a migraine that's lasted 5 days now with no reprieve. I need relief from all of this. It's just been so hard to see him like this.


Funny how a good week can turn into a mess so quickly. Last week I was praying for an easy week because I was having trouble watching Justus and Emma develop and move on from the stages they were in, and now this week, I am longing to deal with that again. That is all so much easier than this. That was all good stress, this week is very bad stress and I've just had enough!

'Birds and the Bees' Talk

We got this little story in our inbox this morning, and I thought it was too funny not to post. Probably in bad taste, but I still thought it was worth sharing.

A little boy goes to his father and asks 'Daddy, how was I born?'
The father answers, 'Well, son, I guess one day you will need to find out anyway! Your Mom and I first got together in a chat room on Yahoo. Then I set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber-cafe. We sneaked into a secluded room, where your mother agreed to a download from my hard drive. As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall, and since it was too late to hit the delete button, nine months later a little Pop-Up appeared that said: 'You got Male!'

My Reflections

One of the things about having kids close together is a lot of milestones happen all at once. We found this with Logan and Abby, who are 17 months apart. We're now finding it's the same with Justus and Emma; they are only 13 months apart.

A few days ago I wrote about Justus' escaping to freedom and tonight I find myself sharing something I'm not sure I'm ready for. Emma has gone mobile. Earlier in the day Steve asked me if I had moved Emma; at the time I didn't think too much of it, I figured she just rolled over. Fast forward to our playtime after dinner. We are all in the family room (which at this point is just one big empty room) and what do I see but Emma DRAGGING herself over to a toy. I thought, WOW, that's pretty amazing. But then she continued to do it most of the evening and my amazement turned to a bit of uncertainty. Add to this momentous occasion the fact that she's starting to sit up on her own a lot more, and is catching herself from falling...that's a whole lot of new for one week!

I must admit that at this moment, (after the kids are in bed and I'm reflecting on a long and exhausting week), I'm feeling a bit emotional. With everything that happened during the first year of Abby's life (My recovering from the accident, and the process of Logan's diagnosis etc), I didn't remember how quickly these stages pass. I think it's even more pronounced because of both Logan and Abby's delays. But as I look back on the kids stages of life, I'm sad to see the end of Emma's life as we know it. Don't get me wrong, I'm SO excited to see her development on track, but there is a small part of me that kind of wishes that I'd be able to enjoy that cute cuddly baby stage a little longer, this is the LAST one after all (I promise!). From my experience with all of the others, once they went mobile, they weren't interested in staying with me very long.

So tonight I say goodbye to that infant stage, I'm letting go. I will embrace whatever life brings in the next stage, and take it by the horns as much as I have this stage. I feel so blessed to have the 4 kids that I do have. They have all taught me such different things, and I love what they offer this family. I love watching the friendships develop between the kids, and I'm excited to see what Emma will offer as she gets older. The one common bond between all of the kids is their love for life, they all approach it so enthusiastically, all from different angles but brimming with life.

This is the end of an emotional week, and I'm praying fervently that next week will be status quo. I'm needing a few weeks of 'calm' (hahahaha) during the holidays so that in 2008, we can start fresh! Boy I don't ask for much, calm in a house of 4 kids with a pastor for a husband around the busiest season of our life...I sure do aim for the stars, don't I?

Exciting Day!

I am so excited this morning! I woke up to find my story published on the Soul Supporter website. This is the first time I've been published, but I will also be published next month in an online literary journal. I don't often talk about myself, but for me, this is a huge accomplishment and one that I HAVE to share! I have always enjoyed writing, and am looking forward to my next course in the college program I'm taking. Hopefully this is the beginning of many things to come. :)

Evidence of Snow Day

Updates from the House of Procrastination

Well, I survived my operation. I am two weeks post-op and everything went beautifully. I spent a week and a few days with my parents, with Emma joining me after the first couple of days. I was anxious to get home, and as always overdid it when I got home, but overall I'm doing well. No complaints coming from me because recovery was easier than the attacks. My only wish would be that Justus STOP using me as a ladder, it's just not comfortable to have little toes in places where a GALLBLADDER just came out of!

Yesterday morning I heard a bit of a thump downstairs (every mothers nightmare, since Justus was downstairs 'napping' at the time.) It was followed by a brief cry and as I was heading downstairs to find out what it was, I heard the dreaded pitter-patter of little toddler feet on the floor, hysterical laughter following. My heart sank that very moment! Justus was a free boy and he knew it, and I knew in that moment the days of his sleeping in a crib were over. You see, he's not a 'oh, how did I do that?' kind of boy, he's been WORKING at it!! So yesterday afternoon was spent Justus' proofing the boys room. Then comes the dreaded FIRST NIGHT in a bed, no crib rails-no nothing, freedom at any moment HE chooses. Thankfully last night, he chose to stay in his bed and sleep :) Our little man is growing up!

The last two days have been SNOW days in our house, no school. Well, the schools were open, but we chose NOT to send the kids. It looked VERY nasty, so we spent our days playing outside in the snow and watching movies. We had a Shrek marathon, all 3 movies back to back. The kids had fun, laughing, chasing each other and fighting over toys. Today I must admit though, I'm very glad to see school return. I am ready for a quiet house. We don't have much furniture upstairs right now (it was sent away to get repaired, our 5 month old furniture, but that's another story!) so the upstairs ECHO is quite loud, add Abby's squealing as well as Justus' imitation of it, and you don't have a very quiet house...so this morning will be quiet since Justus will be napping, as will Emma. A whole hour to myself...oh the joys and bliss those moments will bring, sipping on a hot chai tea (courtesy of my good friend Lindsay in Calgary!) and drinking in the silence of the few moments I do have. Well, that's the hope anyway, given the above paragraph speaks of my toddler in a BED, it's not a given like it would've been say yesterday or the day before! A mother can always pray!

Christmas is quickly approaching, and I have a confession to make; for some reason this year, I'm not overly keen to decorate or anything else for that matter. This is strange for me, considering I'm usually one of those people, you know, the ones that can't wait for Halloween to be over so I can put up my tree and decorations. This year though, I have no motivation. Part of it is probably the fact that I'm recovering from surgery, the other part is I know if I decorate too much or too early, it'll all get destroyed because my kids are notorious for wrecking things. But I just have no motivation, maybe sometime soon I'll find it. I'm kind of running out of time because Christmas is just 20 days away!! Steve doesn't complain, I'm sure he wouldn't care at all if we had decorations up. He's just not that kind of guy. Maybe this year we'll have an undecorated house, or we'll put up the tree on Christmas Eve and take it down on Boxing day. I'm joking of course, but there is part of me that is tempted!

Well, I think that's enough for now. I hope this blog finds you all well, and that YOU are embracing the Christmas Spirit.

Going Under

Today is the day that I go to have my gallbladder removed. It's my first time having surgery, so I'm a bit (read ALOT) nervous this morning. I'm sure that everything will go well, and I'll do just fine...but I'm afraid of the General Anaesthetic. I hate the feeling of being out of control. My other issues this morning are the fact that it's dry in my house, and I woke up PASTY in my mouth. I'm pretty sure I'll be swishing my mouth with water all morning...I have to be at the hospital at 8 AM. I'm sure Steve will update on his blog, or I'll ask him to comment on this to let you know how I made out.

Happy Birthday Steve

Dear Steve,
Just a message to let you know how much I love you. We may have our bumps along the way, but I'd rather have a bumpy road with you than live my life without you. (I almost wrote "I'd rather have a bumpy road without you then live my life with you...OOPS) I pray that this year will be gracious to you, that you will see some dreams fulfilled, and that you will feel truly blessed. Looking forward to what this next year holds for us. Love you hon! xoxoxoxo
Love,
Amanda

Ironicly Funny

This week I had a meeting with the school to discuss the kids Individual Education Plan. At this meeting, I also got some great feedback from their classroom teachers and how the kids are adapting into the classroom. This is too great not to share.

Logan does a great job in class, he is following most of the classroom routine with very little modification for him. During math class there was a substitute teacher who happened to be the learning resource teacher who Logan is quite familiar with. Logan normally stays pretty quiet through the lessons, but because he was so familiar with this teacher, and it was SO out of the ordinary for her to be in this roll, my son actually disrupted the lesson. Of all the kids to get in trouble for back-talking, IT WAS LOGAN!!! I never thought I'd reach the day that I was actually proud of Logan for back-talking. Now please don't misunderstand, he wasn't being rude or mean or anything of the sort, he was just repeating back VERY loudly everything the teacher was saying. It did my heart good to know that Logan has come far enough that he can get in trouble for something that we never really anticipated him to get in trouble for! Oh the things that I can rejoice over. Another thing to add to the list of unexpected triumphs.

Please remember Abby's teacher in your thoughts, in regards to getting used to Abby. I think it will be difficult for any teacher who has had Logan first, being very used to what his behaviours are, to be suddenly confronted with his complete polar opposite the following year. Don't get me wrong, she really likes Abby, and Abby is doing well but she is a very different child from Logan. When you don't have a tremendous amount of experience with autism, and the first couple of children who you do encounter are siblings who are as opposite as can be, it's going to be difficult but rewarding journey.

Prayer

My aunt sent me a forward this morning, and while I don't usually send things on, I thought I'd like to post it on my blog.


May today there be peace within.
May you trust God that you are exactly where you are meant to be.
May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith.
May you use those gifts that you have received, and pass on the love that has been given to you. May you be content knowing you are a child of God.

Let this presence settle into your bones, and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise and love. It is there for each and every one of us.

We never do things easy!

Well, today wasn't a total disaster, but it wasn't at all what we expected either. We got some pictures, but we forgot a lot of stuff, so it'll be for another weekend that we try family pictures. Here's a few from today, that we did take. Justus and Emma were napping, so it was only 4 of us.

Picture Day

Today we are heading off to Chesley to have our pictures taken....can I just say that this is my least favourite day of the whole year!!! Trying to get 4 kids, 2 adults and 1 dog to all look in the same general direction, matching fairly well, and NOT freaking out, drooling, snotting or whatever else may happen, you get the idea. I am sure by the end of the day I will have had enough, and thrown the towel in...but I'm hoping for at least 1 nice picture out of the bunch. Is that too much to ask for? Maybe, but a mother can dream!

The Golden Compass

I was reading Ben Witherington and his take on the Golden Compass movie which is based on Phillip Pullmans trilogy "His Dark Materials". I read the trilogy over my vacation in Calgary and I must say that I really enjoyed the books. They are a great work of sci/fi, and it really got one thinking about religion on a whole. While Pullmans take on it was from an atheistic point of view, I believe it gives insights to Christians as well. He attacks many areas of the Christian church in the book that I myself am ashamed of.

Ben (as if I can be on 1st name basis of someone I don't know!) cautions parents not to bring their kids to see the movie because Phillip Pullman is an atheist and the book is very much anti religion and it will not point towards the "true north". I have been thinking about it all morning and I really disagree with this stance. I believe for too long parents have sheltered their kids from so many things, it tends to make the kids rebel and isolates them from their peers. Instead of not taking the kids, why not take them and use it as a teaching opportunity? I'm of a very strong belief that we must teach our kids about our faith, but running from anything that disagrees with our faith...that's taking it a step too far for me. There was so much buzz around the Harry Potter series a few years ago in Christian circles, and I fear the same thing will happen with this. Although the books were written a number of years ago, they are sure to gain some popularity again with the movie coming out.

Why do Christians feel the need to flee from anything that is different from their beliefs? I want for my kids to have the knowledge to make the decision on their own, of course it's my prayer and desire that they choose our faith, it's our responsibility to demonstrate to our kids what being a Christian is all about. But didn't Jesus hang out with those different from him? Wasn't it him who befriended prostitutes? Didn't have have dinner with tax-collectors? I really believe that we have made a very poor decision by isolating ourselves from the rest of the world. I honestly believe we'd do our kids a better service by showing love to those around us, whether they hold our specific views or not. Why does it have to be an "us/them"? We really should get back to what Jesus teaches us through his actions.

Stepping off my soapbox now!

This is sad

I came across this story on another blog I read. I find it so sad the culture we have become that it's easier to give up than to persevere.